This is me

When the universe decides it wants to send you a message it can come in a whisper, a gift or it can lay the smack down on you.  It seems that everything in my life right now is forcing me to create clarity, and reflect on who I am, where I came from, what is important to me and where I want to go.

I spend my days inspiring and guiding others to be their best selves but rarely take the time to step back and reflect on my own journey.  I am a believer that we can't truly move forward without these moments of looking back and have had many discussions with clients around the importance of this. 

Reflection is a powerful way to adjust your perspective.  It is human nature to focus on what we don't have, what we still want, what we don't like, what we can't do... looking back moves that spot light and illuminates what you do have, what you have created, the things you love and the goals you have already accomplished.

 

This week I had the opportunity to present my ice breaker speech at Toastmasters and it had to be about me and my story. Forcing me, once again, to take a look back and lean into the discomfort of having to talk about and celebrate myself.

 

So for those of you wanting to get to know me more I have decided to share my speech.  

 

Take me or leave me.  This is MY STORY. 

 

School was a struggle for me.  I found learning and staying focused challenging and I struggled with authority and staying within the lines of what I believed was expected of me.  I questioned everything, and wanted to know the why’s and rational behind decisions and choices that were being made in my best interest.  I drove my parents crazy and I remember the phrase “because I said so” as clear as day.  I challenged teachers on why I needed to learn subjects I hated because I already knew I would never chose a job that would require those skills (boy was I wrong with all the number crunching I do now!).  I loved all things creative like English and marketing and still have a love / hate relationship with math. The universe has a funny way of bringing back the lessons not learned the first time around because now I have to listen to my son’s teacher explain to me why Logan needs to learn the value of in the subjects he finds hard.  It is challenging sitting back, exploring a new perspective and not transferring my school experiences and journey onto him.  

 

High school was a bore and if it weren’t for the members of the opposite sex I am not sure if I would have been engaged in it at all.  I spent most of my blocks sitting in McDonalds eating french-fries with mayo and ketchup and feeling anxious about having no direction about where my life was going.  I recall a tearful heart to heart talk with my mom about the stress of having to make life plans and choose “just the right classes to chart my future” or I would end up a failure in a dead end job and a wasted member of society.  Even back then I had incredibly high expectations for myself. 

Yep, that's me and my 80's hair (bottom right)

Grade 12 graduation was touch and go.  It is ironic looking back to acknowledge I have carved out a successful career as a fitness and nutrition coach but almost failed to graduate because I was more interested in that time at McDonalds than I was getting my butt to PE class.  I remember thinking I was the only person to have ever had to write a PE final exam.  Who knew such a thing even existed!

These stories along with taking failing grades in exchange for not having to speak in front of the class are life experiences I share with my clients to encourage them to have faith in the future. It may sound cliche but it holds true where we are today does not dictate what the future holds.  My life and my career is a testament to how I was able to weave a future for myself one step at a time.

I began my career as a fitness and nutrition coach over 12 years ago after the birth of my first son.  I wanted the freedom of being self employed and was ready to write my own ticket and create my own rules.  I remember my dad asking me when I was going to look at getting a "real job".  Being stubborn and tenacious, I owe much of my success to his comment and my desire to prove him wrong. Over 10 years later, more studio space than I know what to do  with and hundreds of satisfied clients, I am proud of the “job” I have built for myself.  I still embrace a “just watch me!” attitude when it comes to leaning into new challenges. 



Newly inspired workouts at Maki Fit!

This year marked my 40^th and looking back I realize just how much living I have done.

 

I was married at the age of 23, and had 2 amazing baby boys before the age of 30.  I remember feeling overwhelmed, lost and wondering if I was missing the female gene that made most women love motherhood.  Years later, with more courage, and confidence in who I am and what my values are, I recognize that I was never alone in my thinking but had failed to connect with other women who shared my sentiments.  I am grateful that 11 years later, and with a new man in my life I am getting to walk that journey again and experience motherhood with a whole new perspective.
 

The men in my life.

Some days it's a challenge running a business and having a 2 year old. I openly admit to missing the freedom that returns as your children get older, but morning snuggles on the couch with baby Jake and a 13 year old who stands taller than me now, remind me that time passes in a blink and to enjoy the moment.   

Cole at his recent track meet!

 



This is me on JUNE 7, 2003 exactly 10 years ago!

In 2003 I decided that in order to help my clients transform their bodies I needed to look at transforming my own.  My parents had invested their time and money to develop the dancer in me growing up (which also fell prey to boys and McDonalds) and competing in fitness and figure allowed me to dust off my skills and revisit an old passion. 

I was successful at not just transforming my body, but also achieving many first place finishes, a pro card and eventually a top 10 finish at the  Fitness Universe Pageant where I stood proudly among some of the top competitors in the industry.  

 



And this is me today !

 

 

 

 

 

The journey of competing, the personal wins and moments of defeat, the injuries, the victory's, the hours dedicated to my training, nutrition and my desire to learn everything I could, and be a better coach is where my real accomplishment and memories live. 

 

Who knows, maybe a spark with re-ignite the flame to return to stage but right now my focus is on the true loves in my life.

 

 My family, my work and my desire for adventure and travel. 

Sky diving Sept 2008

 



I don’t know where my next 40 years will take me personally or professionally but I do know that I will continue to see the beauty in the simple, I wilI love and honor my boys journey and choices, and I will continue to change lives and live with passion, purpose and adventure.